Always On My Mind?

There is an issue that is struggled with constantly in Christian visual artist circles. At least I came to meet this dilemma many times in conversations with fellow schoolmates in university. The issue has to do with a conversation in one’s mind. How much credit can I take for my work?

Oil Painting, God Speaking With Joshua

Let me explain with a personal remembrance of a painting that I created for a painting course. I believe I was in 400 level painting class. This may mean nothing to you other than I was well past the basics, was allowed to experiment with my personal style, and was critiqued more on how to turn out “better” art and less on basics (such as how to hold a brush). I remember working over one painting late at night in the classroom studios. It was a still night and I happened to have the studio all to myself. These were wonderful nights when I could set my music the way I wished and sing without being embarrassed. I was working on a canvas that was approximately four foot by five foot. I tend to paint abstract expressionistic figures. Again, all this information need tell you is that in order to express feeling and emotion on such a large canvas I had to work my arm and body to paint. On a large canvas in this style one cannot merely move the wrist. The atmosphere was set. I had recently been studying the book of Joshua in my quiet times and with the atmosphere of the Christian music and no one to talk to me but God I began to receive a picture of God’s relationship to Joshua. I saw Joshua as a youth and not a mighty man of God. He was but a child that was being asked to take over for God’s previous leader Moses. Like a great and nurturing father God brought Joshua to Himself and told him to be strong and courageous in his future endeavors. I saw God not only nurturing but pointing Joshua to his destiny as a parent coaxes a frightened child to go down a park slide. As I moved paint around the canvas, God showed me how I’m like Joshua.

Before we get off on a tangent dealing with Joshua, let me say that the painting was very much a success. I ended up with a colorful work that expressed the fear of Joshua and the fatherly nature of God. My professor and classmates loved it in our critique time and I was overjoyed that I barely had to defend my work and process to get top marks. Now here is where the dilemma of my fellow Christians comes into play. How much credit do I take for my work and how much honor do I devote to God? I had some classmates and refused to take any credit for any artistic piece that came from their hands. I had others that beg I take all the credit because indirectly it honored God. I personally like to think that there isn’t a definite answer to this question so that this issue is something that MUST be revisited constantly to be sure that God isn’t driven out of the equation. It is a fluid event that one continuely needs to ask: Do I remember where my talent comes from?

In Deuteronomy 8 the Israelites are being told that there wandering in the desert was to prepare them for the good times ahead. I can remember that in the garden of Eden humanity had the problem of forgetting God’s rightful place when they had things good. God was bumped to a lower part of the equation. Later on in history God delivers His people from slavery in Egypt. He gives them signs and wonders so that they would not forget Him. The Israelites were forced through life to make sure God was given the due respect He deserved. Before Moses went up Mt. Sinai to get the ten commandments the people heard the booming voice of God and feared Him. However, later they disregarded God when they built an idol to worship. Now the Israelites are wandering in the desert. They are being reminded of the food and water that had been miraculously given to them. They had to endure poisonous snakes and scorpions. They had to trust God lead them day by day through the fierce conditions of the desert. We are told in chapter 8 that this was a test so that they wouldn’t again drop God out of the equation when they finally arrived to the promised land. From what I’m reading about the promised land it would be easy to forget God. I mean they’re going to a place where they will always have a roof over their heads (no more of the nomad life – woo hoo) and they would always have a good meal. Also, there is the promise of precious metals. Basically, all of their basic needs will always be met and some. They would never have to worry about a thing. Interestingly that sounds similar to the Garden of Eden too and I’m living how that turned out. It’s really no wonder that the Israelites are given a warning that they must not forget that God is giving them the strength that they will use to cultivate this future life. The consequence for their forgetfulness is simple – destruction. The same folly that would befall the enemies of God would also come upon them.

The key lesson that I’m seeing here is that there is folly in being full of myself and forgetting where my strength comes from. In the competitive and busy world that I live in it is easy for me to rely on my own strength. I have food to eat and a roof over my head. It can be easy for my to think that I’m the master artist that provides and creates.
Where in my life is there the need to recognize God’s provision? What do I need to offer Him thanks for? How do I show Him my gratitude?

Down On The Farm

Have you ever looked into your childhood and cherished an event that as a child you took for granted? For example there are many times that I spent on my grandparents’ farm that were exciting for me. I remember going for long walks in fields along creeks. I remember taking the time to pause and skip rocks or even wade through the water. I had fun climbing hay bails in the pastures on a warm spring day. I can recall jumping from bail to bail with my cousins as we had races or played an altered version of King of the Hill.

The times that I took for granted were the moments that I spent the night with my grandparents at their home. In the morning I always awoke to the sound of the rooster crowing. That sound signaled me that it was time to start shaking off my sleepiness and head from my second floor guest bed to the main floor kitchen. Grandma was usually making something mouth-watering like bacon and eggs with fresh marmalade for toast. I liked to help set the table and get the large jar of milk from the refrigerator. The milk was fresh from the cow and I remember how that milk tasted distinctly different from our store-bought milk from my house. And speaking of different tastes, let’s talk about the butter for the toast. Real butter that was churned at the farmhouse. My sister and I were never morning people so conversation around the breakfast table was slim. However, I remember that we would pray and begin eating after grandpa came back from his morning chores. After grandma finished eating, she would take out her Bible and daily devotional book. This is the part that was taken for granted. As a kid you hoped that the adult talk would get over with quickly so that you could get outside and play before the sun decided to go down. I didn’t realize at the time that I was witnessing grandma and grandpa’s faith at work. They had lived through many trial and situations in life and through inspection of the scriptures and trials of life they found that the account of Christ to be real. Time with God in the morning was not an option for these two believers.

Later in life I was reminded to take into account their faith as I witnessed my grandfather in a nursing home. Grandpa had been in an auto accident with a semi which left his right side paralyzed. Grandma in her older age was not able to care for him and sorrowfully was forced to put him in the nursing home. The moment that I saw was their evening ritual. Grandma never missed a beat to visit grandpa in the evening so that they could pray together. They asked for privacy during this time. The rest of the family would wait outside in the hallway while you could hear mumbled prayers being said to God. If you denied that the mumbling was a need for privacy between two saints still in love or just chit-chat, there was no mistaking the next part of the nightly ritual. As clear as day one could hear the reciting of the Lord’s prayer in the hallway.

At the beginning of our reading in Luke today the author, Luke, is setting up his written work for his friend Theophilus. Luke’s account of the life of Christ is unique because it isn’t created by a person that actually witnessed the events of Christ’s life. Instead Luke carefully examined the stories and writings of eyewitnesses to put together his gospel. What was the purpose of his laborious research? Luke wants his friend to know beyond all doubt that Christ was the Savior. Theophilus needed to know that what he was being taught about Christ was reliable.

The thrilling idea to me at this moment is that I too have eyewitness accounts that have been recorded and preserved through the Holy Spirit inside the Scriptures. It is great to realize that the feeding of the five thousand was witnessed by men, recorded in the Bible, and given to me to help my faith that Christ is the Lord. I didn’t receive a letter directly from Luke but I have lived my life beside friends, grandparents, parents, and others that have searched the Bible and other types of thought to find that the teachings of the Bible are truth.

The pondering that this short introduction builds in me is wondering if others see this excitement that I have from my faith. Do people see my faith as real or as a ritual that I must perform weekly? Will my children look back on their childhood and be proud of their father that strove to walk out his faith? Is my life showing signs of my faith in Christ or is it merely showing signs of what TV shows I enjoy watching?

Needing a Good Set of Wheels

Today’s reading is Leviticus 11-12 and Mark 7:1-13.

My wife had an unusual childhood. You see her dad was born with several heart defects of which only a couple were known about while he was alive. Her father shouldn’t have lived past age six, but by the grace of God, he was able to grow up and start a family. The defects got the best of him and even a heart transplant couldn’t remedy the situation. Thus, at the age of eleven my wife had to figure out how to live in a family without dad. Finances were obviously a major issue in a new single parent household that had outrageous amounts of hospital bills. My mother-in-law worked three jobs just to keep food on the table and keep the lights on in the house. As a preteen and teenager, there are certain articles that are needed to maintain a “cool” status in high school. One needs to have clothes, the right shoes for track and cross-country, and a hair crimper (did I mention that she was in high school during the nineties). Obviously, these things were not going to be obtained by begging mom. I mean come on. With three jobs mom did good to make it home to sleep a couple of hours. So the natural choice for my wife was to march straight into a government building and demand her fair share of welfare to get what she needed, right? No. Sorry. My wife’s family is no stranger to hard work (need I cite once again that her mom worked around the clock at numerous jobs). What does one need to get a minimum wage job when you live in a rural community? Well, politeness, smarts, and transportation.

Here’s where the path is blocked. You see the death of my wife’s father allowed the household to attain a small amount of survivor’s benefits. However, if she were to get a car to get work, she would need a job, and if she got a job, the survivor’s benefits would cease (don’t ask me why I still don’t understand it all). Consequently, this left the family in a catch 22 situation. There was no way that a vehicle would benefit the family when the government monies were being used to sustain life. The job my wife would have gotten would have given her the resources needed to get her things that the other teens had in her class. Clothes. accessories. extracurriculars.

I know that many of us can look at that situation and think that life is full of disappointments and you need to simply be happy with your health and family. I still find a sadness that someone with the energy and committment to work was not allowed to pursue their dreams. It seems as though that the rules that were setup were working against her.

Looking at Leviticus 11 & 12 you may be overwhelmed with the laws and details there within. I know I was. There was something that caught my eye though. When a mother gave birth to a child they were to make two sacrifices. A sin sacrifice and a burned offering. Generally speaking the sin sacrifice was made to pay the price of the sins of an individual for a whole year. Aren’t you glad that we simply have to believe on Jesus instead of slaughtering a bull every year? Now the sin sacrifice for this situation called for either a dove or a pigeon. This was something that had to be done by everyone across the board. If you had a baby, you had to produce one of these feathered friends. Now the other sacrifice was the burned offering and according to the commentary I read this was the “Thank You God” offering. It was the joyful offering because you were given the gift of a child. Even though this offering was giving thanks to God, it was still a command that it MUST be offered after the birth of a child. A year old lamb was the normal requirement for this sacrifice. However, as we read later in chapter 12, we see that provisions are made for a dove or pigeon to be used in the lambs place should the parents not be able to afford a lamb. In fact I was interested to see in the gospel of Luke that Mary and Joseph had to offer a pigeon as the burned sacrifice when Jesus was born because they were a poor family.

What does this say to me? God is a God that wants all to be involved in his loving plan of salvation. He cares and desires relationship with all of us. When God setup this command of the burned offering He knew that there would be families like my wife’s that would not be able to afford finer things. He still wanted them involved in the process of worship and relationship with Him. God allowed cheaper animals to be used in the process. This story also tells me that all have sinned because all need an atonement sacrifice when they were born. This sacrifice was the same for everyone in the world. It cost the parents little but their faith had to be their to put it into practice. God wants all in a loving relationship with Him.

An interesting thought that I’ll leave you with is this. If God has given you much or done much in your life, are you worshipping and serving him with the higher cost of a year old lamb or are y ou still giving him a pigeon?

Day 28: Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Promise to Repeat

Today’s Reading:

Genesis 27-28 & Matthew 18:21-35

Growing up, we used to play a game in which we would sit in a circle and give one another a chance to tell a truth, complete a dare or a really courageous double dare, or make a promise to repeat a phrase that you may not want to repeat.

Our text resembles a similar situation in my imagination. Jacob and Rebecah are outside the house and Jacob is faced with the options of telling the truth to his father, taking the dare of retreiveing the meat before his brother could return, or the doubledare of “costuming” as his brother to fool his father. Jacob agreeing to do all the previous acts caused him to also have to “promise to repeat” one lie after another.

Have you ever been in a situation where a close family member has hurt you in a manner you only perceived an enemy would? Have you ever been promised something, to find out that what you were expecting was stolen or given away? We find Esau on the brink of receiving his fathers blessing, but his brother Jacob had a different plan.

Jacob and Esau are no longer boys. They are 77 years old. Their father Isaac is very aged. He is 137 years old and he could not see. Rebekah knew God’s promise but she tried a carnal scheme to try to bring it to pass (sounds familiar right?). Jacob was old enough to know better but went along with this scheme and fully participated in the deception. Usually our evil plans and plots do not work out as well as we had hoped.

Jacob was probably hoping that he would not have to lie with his mouth, but his sin of deception led to the next sin: lying. Not only does he lie but he brings God’s name into it!

So in accrodance to our reading for today, below are some quick trivia questions to spark your understanding of the passage. Enjoy, and good luck!!!

Should parents always be obeyed?

Should Jacob have obeyed Rebekah in this case?

In Genesis 27:12 what word describes what Jacob actually was?

What was the first question Isaac asked?

Why did Isaac in verse 20 ask; “How did you kill the animals and prepare the meat so quickly’?

Today Takeaway’s:

1. LET US NOT DO EVIL THAT GOOD MAY COME – Rebekah and Jacob had a good goal in mind: to get God’s promised blessing. If God has promised us blessing, then we should let Him bring the blessing in His time and in His way.
2. BE SURE YOUR SIN WILL FIND YOU OUT – Rebekah and Jacob were totally exposed and their deception was brought to light. Jacob’s sin was going to catch up with him! Instead of being the DECEIVER he is going to be the one DECEIVED!

Day #24 – Who’s in Charge Here Anyways?

Today’s Reading: Job 38-40; Matthew 15:21-30

Within the last couple of years my father told me a story that I have no recollection of occurring. It seems that when I was around five years old, I was with my dad visiting my grandmother at her home. I enjoyed being with grandma. So understandably when it was time to pack up and go home, I decided to prolong the stay. I’m not sure why but at five years old screaming and crying seems to be the best plan of attack for everything. When that appears to get attention you have to retreat to unattainable ground before the big folks can make you stop. I did great on both accounts. The waterworks were going and I managed to get myself sandwiched between grandma’s stove and cabinets. My dad had no hope of fitting in the tight space and his powerful arms couldn’t reach the length of the gap. Victory was mine!
“BAAAHHHH!”
A scream that bellowed throughout the kitchen for at least ten seconds. Then… silence.
“Okay, we’ve both had our scream and we’ve both had our fun. Now it’s time to go.”
Defeat set in as I was reminded that dad was in control and out trumped my puny little voice.

Sometimes like a child we think we are "big" and "bad." We forget there is a bigger and more powerful God over all things.

Jump over to Job. Throughout the book you have to feel sorry for this guy. He loses everything and then is taunted by his friends, who claim that all his calamity is a result of his sin. Not exactly the glamorous lifestyle of the saint that we would envision. Job sits around in the dust and wants God to answer for His actions. I’m with Job. God what were you thinking? I also have the benefit of looking at this story from an outsider’s viewpoint. I got to see that Satan and God were challenging each other on whether Job would cave-in and curse God after all the unfortunate events. Seriously. There need to be some answers here from the source.

Well, God shows up to speak with our downtrodden friend. I’ll admit I was pretty excited. Even last week I remember Job declaring that his situation was unfair. I just can’t help but feel that God will show up and give Job good reason for all the suffering. At the very least God is going to vindicate Job’s emotions and give the plague to the taunters…. er, friends, right? NOT! Instead God throws rhetorical question after question at Job to remind Job that He (God) is sovereign not only over Job but EVERYTHING.

“God then confronted Job directly: ’Now what do you have to say for yourself? Are you going to haul me, the Mighty One, into court and press  charges?’ Job Answers God I’m Ready to Shut Up and Listen Job answered: ‘I’m speechless, in awe – words fail me. I should never have opened my mouth! I’ve talked too much, way too much. I’m ready to shut up and listen.’”

I can see the whole situation play out like my childhood situation. Here is a kid thinking that he is going to control a situation that is unfair in his eyes. The whining and tears begin. While dad has watched and been present for the whole situation, he finally speaks up. God’s questions are like throwing cold water on a panic-stricken person. It snaps Job out of his emotional state and starts to put things into perspective. I would like to see my situation as unfair and give my input on how my life should play out. However, there is one that is of more infinite wisdom and power than I that is in control.

Okay. Fine. God is in control. He has seen my days play out before I was ever thought of being in existence. He controls the universe and all its intricate parts. Each day – each breath that I’m given is a gift and I should be grateful for my life.
However, here are my questions coming from these chapters:
-It was okay for Job to feel sorrow. Was it okay for him to feel cheated?
- Where in my life am I pretending to be the authority figure apart from God?
- Why do I have to feel in charge?

Day #17 – It’s Not Fair

Today’s readings are from Job 22-24  (The Message) and Matthew 12:1-23 (The Message).

It’s not fair.
It’s such a common phrase, especially with children in the home. Okay, let me be honest. This phrase is common in my vocabulary; I just don’t vocalize it like my children.

It’s not fair.
Every time I hear it I see it said with a passionate plea. More than likely one feels they have been wronged in some way and either with an enraged or deeply sorrowful way the phrase is cried out to the air.

It’s not fair.

I connect with Job in today’s Old Testament reading. Here is a man who has lost everything and surrounded by friends that are pointing out his sinful nature. I can only imagine that after being told several times to renew his faithfulness to God and turn from his sinful ways that Job must be going mad in his head. He must be reviewing the video of his life and searching for an episode of a day in his life where he would deserve the calamity brought upon him.

Finally, after the all the video has been watched and he returns to the real world, Job is left with a sense of injustice. It’s not fair – God can’t do this (Job 23:2).

Let’s jump forward in history now to a time when Jesus is telling a story about a son that asks for his father’s inheritance before his father is close to being deceased. The kid wastes all of the money on wild living and is forced to get a culturally degrading job. The boy finally puts away his pride and decides to go home to his father. The part that I pay attention to here is that the father is THRILLED that his son is home BUT the older son is ticked at his sibling. In fact the older son marches over to his father, who is in the middle of putting together a very expensive “welcome home” party, and heatedly confronts him on his actions. It’s not fair – I’ve been the loyal son and worked hard by your side all these years. Actually, Job does a bit of this in chapter 23 and 24. He speaks about his loyalty to God’s commands and then in chapter 24 he talks about how the wicked get away with everything under the sun.

If I’m honest here, I have to say that I relate with these feelings and emotions sometimes. If told, my life story doesn’t have the dramatic telling as some folks. I’ve been a goody-two-shoes during my life. I’ve never been on drugs or addicted to alcohol. I grew up in a Christian home where I honestly don’t remember a time that I didn’t think Jesus died on the cross for my sins. Consequently, when I hit a rough patch in life, I can relate with Job (and maybe more so the eldest son). It’s not fair. I see others making it in life. They don’t know God but they seem to have more income, an easier time performing their day-to-day tasks, less struggles – their life looks to be like something out of “Ozzy and Harriet.” In my head life should be run like the family business. You know what I’m saying – after ten years of service God gives you a watch and twenty years an exotic vacation with a good yearly raise. Life should be simpler.

I know. I know. I’m being selfish here. “It’s not about me; It’s about Him.” “Where is your faith that God will provide?” “You are better off than ‘them’ because you have God’s hope of eternal life.” Yeah. Yeah. I’ll work on it.

The nugget of encouragement that I take is connected with the end of Job 23 starting at verse 13. Job understands clearly that God is sovereign. He grasps quite clearly that God is in charge of not only the universe but of his small life. Now despite the fact that Job gets the unbelievable power of God, Job still is able to cry out, “It’s not fair.” Are there holes in my thinking? Probably. I mean Job REALLY didn’t cause his “unfair” moment while my moments are usually brought on by selfishness. However, God is merciful enough to allow me, his creation, to come before Him with whining and complaints. He cares for me even though I’m the one that has wronged Him. That’s not fair – thank God.